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Male 'Menopause'

West Hurley, NY - Question: "Do men as well as women go through change of life symptoms? I have been happily married for 26 years. My husband is now 48 and in the past few years has acted like a stranger. He has been very cold to me, short tempered and very. tight with money (he was always very generous). Any suggestion would be appreciated."

Middle age is supposed to be a time of stress for women only.

At this time not only do they encounter menopause but they are often at a dead end in their activities and interests - mainly because their children are no longer at home.

Men are not supposed to suffer in any special way at this time of life. However, recent studies by various professions including psychologists and psychiatrists indicate that many men do go through a "change of life."

While the male does not usually experience a cessation of fertility, the glandular system has slowed down and more important, he tends to look back and take stock of himself. He is also likely to concentrate not on what he has accomplished but on what he has not accomplished - not only in business or on the job, but with his family and home life.

He may also feel a profound anxiety. because of age consciousness.

He knows that it is difficult to change jobs after age 40 and he may also suddenly realize that he has been working at an unsatisfying job or profession for years and that it probably was wrong for him from the start. fie may feel this way even though he has been highly successful.

On the other hand, no matter how devoted a father he may have been, he cannot possibly feel as strong a jolt as his wife does when all the children disappear and the house is suddenly quiet and empty.

However, he also feels a strong psychological shock at middle age and the impact of his wife's sudden bewilderment, insecurity and loneliness adds fuel to the flames.

He can easily be subject to the same depression and vagaries of emotions which menopause sometimes creates in a woman. Between husband and wife, they just do not know what is happening to them.

Men should be educated to realize that they, was well as women, may pass through a crucially trying period at middle age. Once they recognize this fact and accept the realism that it is a time of adjustment for men also, their new moods and misgivings will become more bearable.

If husband and wife give one another special understanding and support during this difficult period, they can both be happy rather than miserable.

Question:. "My job leaves me with tired muscles that result in continuous arm aches and backaches. Aside from this I am a very active and fit mother of three (age 41) attend some college swimming classes where a sauna is available. I am wondering how often I should take a sauna to get some relief from my pains and aches. Are saunas injurious to the heart or lungs? "

There is no simple answer to how often you should use a sauna. They are usually not harmful to heart or lungs if used in moderation, unless you have a diagnosed heart condition, high blood pressure, lung problem, hardening of the arteries or some circulatory disorder.

You should not stay in a sauna too long or take them too hot so that you begin to have difficulty in breathing, become dizzy or uncomfortable in some way.

They should never be taken at a temperature that leaves you feeling weak and dragged out afterward.

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